“At that moment, I recalled a quote from Albert Camus’s work ‘The Stranger’: ‘The absurd is beyond all life. True consciousness establishes a dizzying balance in the face of the meaninglessness of everything.’ These words made me contemplate. Perhaps I needed to stand against the meaninglessness of life.
My headache and nausea seemed like a reflection of an internal conflict. However, maybe these physical discomforts could be an outward expression of the conflict within my soul. Lost within myself, the pains I experienced while searching for meaning might be an exit door.
Kafka’s works came to mind: ‘The path passes through the dark corridors of despair.’
From that in milliseconds on, rather than questioning the meaning of life, I decided to embrace its meaninglessness. My headache and nausea gradually subsided. Along with the reduction of physical discomforts, my internal conflict also lightened, if only slightly.
Perhaps, when we fall into despair on the road to our goals, the solution lies not only in the search for meaning but also in accepting the absurdity. Life may well be the effort to find acceptance and internal balance in this acknowledgment.”